Sunday, January 27, 2008

Tom: The unusually sized animal cracker

This is Tom. Tom is not like his fellow low fat Stauffer animal friends. Tom is unusually sized. Tom is almost twice the width of his fellow cracker delights. How did I come across Tom? Well, let me tell you. I was munching on the little zoo of crunchy treats when my unconscious mind grabbed ahold of Tom. (Tom did not yet have his name) My mind recognized that Tom weighed much more than his similar companions so, without thinking, I just set him down. My mind, thinking on its own, was like, "Dude! This can't be an animal cracker! It weighs too much!" So I didn't even know I had set it down.  I looked down at the table a bit later and was all like, "What? How did this one escape my mouth?" I picked it up and was about to bite into his head when it struck me. He was huge! So, like I do to most things, I named it. He became Tom. Why Tom? Good question. I have no idea. All I know is that once a food item has a name, my conscious will not let me eat it. Tom is officially a real being now. Not a human being of course, but a cracker being. Tom will live with me until I pass him on to a new friend. (Much like I did to Fred and Billy the lucky little gummy bears that escaped deaths gnawing teeth)

1 comment:

Jake Bramante said...

Thank God the evil cat has a name...